This blog makes no sense

No, I assure you, she does not need another drink. Maybe you should back off a little, don't you think? Relax? I am quite relaxed, sir. No, she most certainly does not need an escort home. I can handle it myself, thank you. No, you are the one who needs to chill out, sir.

Please don't call your friends over to distract me. I am now very much involved.

Hey, wait a second! I did not call you a rapist, why did you tell them that?

No, I did not call him that. No, I do not think he is a bad person. Excuse me? No, I am not crazy. We will be leaving now. No, I did not imply that he is a rapist! I know very little about him! I only asked him to back off. Why, you ask? How did you not notice? She asked three times for him to leave her alone, which he ignored!

Yes, Jennifer, you are coming with me. Can you quit falling over, please? Let's go. I promise we have had enough fun for tonight.

No, I am not a crazy bitch. I am only doing what I have been told over and over. Wouldn't you expect your friends to look out for you when you are incapable, sir? No? I am afraid I do not understand. Haven't you been told repeatedly? Always assume everyone is dangerous. No? Surely, then, you have seen the posters! Only you are responsible for your safety. No? You are not told everyday that you are accountable no matter how much you drink? You are not constantly reminded to respect others?  How absurd! How unfair! How backwards!

No, sir, neither of us would like a drink.

PSA: it's time to log off

Does this look familiar? Does it look fun? Do they look social? Like a community? What would you do in this situation? Wait! Let me guess! You would pull out your phone, wouldn't you? Of course you would! How awkward! The "cell phone effect" is a snowball.

How far will it go? Will it ever stop? According to Gary Shteyngart and the Auschwitz Selfie Girl the answer is no. Her holocaust-selfie offers a brief and terrifying glimpse into Shteyngart's future: social media exposure will dominate all other communication and all judgement will be made in terms of online popularity. What a terrifying prospect.

I know what you are thinking: I would never be so obsessed! Ten-years-ago-teens never would have imagined carrying an encyclopedia of the life of every acquaintance they have ever briefly encountered in their pockets, either... but look at us now! Those same teens are now the very grown-ups manically documenting the lives of their small children and forgetting to enjoy the everyday moments.

Wait! I know what you are thinking! Isn't this a blog? Like a social media blog? Yes, yes it is and it seems to be one of the most ironic places to discount social media. However, where else could I guarantee my message will reach its audience? Alas, here lies the paradox: how can one voice their opposition of social media to the to the intended audience (heavy social media users) without using the only common channel?

The solution is to log off and free yourself from the tethers of connectivity. It's not to say everyone should delete every online trace, but to remember that memories are equally, if not more, valuable if they never get posted online.

Life happens offline.


images: https://douglasgreen.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/friends-laughing.jpg, http://static.parade.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/do-we-text-too-much-ftr.jpg, http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-apps/imrs.php?src=http://img.washingtonpost.com/news/the-intersect/wp-content/uploads/sites/32/2014/07/620-breanna.jpg&w=1484